Settling down | Blog

Hello??? It's me... (if you didn't read that in the style of Adele then who even are you?!)
There a few tumble weeds blowing through this blog as it’s been a while since I’ve actually written regularly on here. I’ve had a bit of a love/hate relationship with my blog recently as I’ve preferred to post on social media as it’s so much quicker and more convenient (see my last post all about that here) but then again, I’ve missed being able to let all the words tumble out of me and to catch them all on paper (or screen... you know what I mean!) So where have I been? Well life feels like it was shaken around a bit recently but it finally feel like everything has settled down, for now anyway!

Is Blogging Dead? | Blog

I started blogging almost 4 years ago and back then it was so different. I wrote about whatever I wanted to, whenever I wanted to with no thoughts given to SEO, page views or followers. I wrote because it gave me a creative outlet and made me feel less alone whilst I was on maternity leave. There was also a little community that I found through blogging. Like minded people who also wrote about parenting and shared their lives across social media. Sometimes you even saw those people at events and conferences and it was always strange because you’d never met them face to face before but you knew everything about each others lives as you read their blogs. There was linkies everywhere you looked. People commented on blog posts and shared them. Brands and companies wanted to work with bloggers. They wanted to send you products and pay you to write about them because your voice was valuable and relatively unique. I loved blogging and the world that it threw me into but 4 years down the line, that world is now a very different place.

Working with your partner to stay happy | Collaboration

https://unsplash.com/photos/vrkSVpOwchk

A successful relationship and a successful marriage are all about partnership. When you’re young, it’s easy.
You and your partner have your whole life ahead of you; you’re excited about the future, you’re ready to take
each day as it comes. You plan holidays, your wedding and honeymoon, your future home, your kid’s names,
and all the little things in between that make up a relationship. You support them, and they support you. 

It’s this team element that makes the best couples. They are always there for each other as you both work
towards a shared goal. But what happens when you achieve everything you wanted to? What happened when
you’ve gotten married, had kids, found your dream home? What happens next? 

After everything is done, it’s time to focus on the rest of your time together. But you’re not the same
doe-eyed couple who first shared a shy smile across the room at school or the party. You’ve gotten older,
but you don’t have to act older, and you can keep each other young. Here is some advice on how to work
alongside your partner to stay youthful and keep the good days going strong. 

For Her

We don’t live in the past anymore, and the idea that a woman’s life is over after children is an archaic myth,
but that doesn’t stop older generations still pondering what a woman’s to do after kids, marriage, and a house
to call their own. 

In reality, though, a woman’s life can truly start after having kids. From here, she can build upon her supposed
life success and be a better person every day. You can be a better person every day. 

Alongside your partner, you can arrange the best way to proceed in life, including childcare and careers. You
can also look at getting qualifications and experience that may have been missed out beforehand. Now, you
know what you want. You’re done navigating the nonsense 20-year-old you would need to put up with. Now,
you’re a woman on a mission. 

With this newfound Don’t Care attitude, it’s easy to rediscover your youth that wasn’t exactly lost, but instead,
put on hold. Not all of it will be plain sailing, though, so if you need help, you can rely on your partner to
keep you pushing forward. 

For Him

Men are often forgotten about when talking about getting older. It still affects them just as much as it affects
women, though. In some cases, it can be even worse, as they feel they don’t have anyone to turn to if they
need to talk about feeling old. 

There are plenty of things that can affect a man’s emotional and physical health as time moves on. It could be
visible signs of ageing such as wrinkles or hair loss. Luckily, this isn’t the end of the world, and you can support
them by advising on skincare routines or help them find solutions to balding.
Finasteride is a prescribed hair loss treatment that has proven popular in the past, so it could be something
to check out. 

Other problems could include missed opportunities, or the feeling of missed opportunities, at least. Men are
most associated with the mid-life crisis for a reason. They thought they had time to wait before following their
dreams and then, suddenly, they convinced themselves that’s not the case. 

When this happens, you can take a look at what they want to do and work out ways how they can do it. It may
not solve the problem immediately, but it should put their mind at ease, at least for a time. And if you need to
treat him to cheer him up, here are some ideas to try. 

For Both of You

While it’s a great thing to have your time to yourselves, it’s also essential you don’t neglect each other. Part of
the reason you’ve been together for so long is that you adore each other’s company, and reigniting that initial
spark is one of the easiest ways to work together and feel like giggling teenagers once again. 

All couples have traditions. It could be a movie night, date night, sharing new music as soon as it’s released,
or taking on new challenges like marathons, hikes, or throwing yourselves into something new. Whatever it is,
there’s a chance you might have let these you-times fall by the wayside. 

There are few better things to get you energised and feeling young again than nostalgia. Dedicate some time in your busy lives to relive your more youthful years by indulging in old traditions, or even starting new ones. 

Going through these old (but also new) experiences together will invigorate you with new life. You’ll meet new
people, have new experiences, and prove to yourself and each other that you still know how to have a good
time. After kids, it can be hard to get back to living life your way, but that doesn’t mean you can’t. 

For Them

Flushing yourself with vim and vigour won’t just benefit each other. Your kids, family, friends, coworkers, and
even strangers will recognise something new within you. This isn’t to say you need to work together to stay
youthful for anyone but yourself, but being known as the fun couple who are up for just about anything will rub
off on those around you. 

The fact is that people like to be around people who enjoy themselves, and if you can make the most of it,
you’ll be the most popular couple around. You’ll still need to know when to say no and when to take it easy,
there are still plenty of responsibilities, after all. But knowing you aren’t confined to your living room all week
because you need to look after the kids and save money will give you a reason to reconnect with everyone
you’ve not contacted in a while. 

Teamwork Makes the Dream Work

It’s not enough to just say you’ve got each other’s backs. You’ve got to prove it to one another and the rest of
your family. There will be times where you’re not sure what to do or what to say, but that’s okay. While you will
share this journey into the next stage of your life, you won’t always understand what the other is going through,
but you can at least stand by them and work with them to help them get through it.

7 years of loving you | Blog

To my wonderful Husband,

I don’t even know how to start this post. As I sit here looking at the letters on the keys in front of me it seems almost impossible to get the words out into something that is even a little cohesive. 7 years of marriage but many more of loving you…I don’t even know where to start.

When I think about our life together, I feel like it started when we were 15. We were young, innocent and full of hopes and dreams. I remember the coach trip to Disneyland Paris where we sat and talked about everything and anything. I felt like I could tell you anything and you would never judge me. You made me feel safe, loved and invincible. Fast forward 15 years and you still make me feel like that every single day. You are my biggest cheerleader and supporter and I always know that with you I have a safe place, a confident and a best friend. You make me feel like I can do anything and I know that you’ll always be there to catch me if it doesn’t go right.

We have been through so much together. We’ve seen each other through stress, job changes, the loss of loved ones and illness. It doesn’t matter what comes our way we face it together because we are a team and that’s the way it will always be.

We had so many more good times than bad. Our wedding day was one of the most amazing days of my life. 7 years ago, today I woke up at 6 am and went bounding into my mum and dads’ room shouting, ‘I’m getting married today!!!’. For me, it wasn’t the getting married part that was exciting, it was the fact that I was doing it with you. Our day was perfect from beginning to end. We laughed (remember when I whispered, ‘Sausage surprise!!’ to you for some random reason as we were signing the register and we couldn’t stop laughing?), we danced, and we drank a lot of champagne! It was just perfect and if I could do it again I wouldn’t as it would never be as good as that day was.

You really weren’t joking in your speech when you said that you were going to spend the rest of your life trying to make me happy were you? You’ve got to 7 years so far and you’re doing a blinding job. Our lives have changed so much since that day, but you still make me happier than I thought I ever could be. We now have our 2 beautiful boys and I remember how people told me when I was pregnant that our relationship would change, and I was scared. They were right, our relationship did change. We may not hold hands everywhere any more or have all our time to devote to each other BUT seeing the father that you are makes me love you more than I ever thought possible. Our boys are so incredibly lucky to have you as a father and I will be forever grateful that it was me you chose to build your family with.

So, what’s the point of this soppy, kiss ass post? Well, just to tell you that I am so pleased we said, ‘I do’ and that I have loved the past 7 years with you. Things aren’t always roses and sunshine but the good times always outweigh the bad and I am so happy that I get to go on this ride with you. I don’t know what the next 7 years have in store, but I do know that if it’s with you then it will be filled with happiness, laughter and love.

I love you forever Mr Moo.

F.A.R

xx