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6.7.20

Kick Starting Our Weight Loss with 1:1diet | Review

NOTE: This post is a review of a free plan we were gifted for the purpose of this review but all opinions are honest and my own. 

If you’ve followed my blog for a while, then you will know that at the start of this year I re-joined Slimming world again in an attempt to feel healthier and lose some weight. I am a huge advocate for loving yourself and your body BUT I am also an advocate of doing what you want to do to feel good about yourself. COVID – 19 hit and I fell off the slimming world wagon hard. 3 months being in lockdown with the kids at home meant that we did a lot of baking, a lot of cooking and a lot of snacking. All the weight I had lost at slimming world was back plus some more! At the time when we were baking brownies every week and eating a crazy amount of food, I was happy. It was our coping mechanism to get through lockdown and as much as I did not regret it, something needed to change as my lifestyle was becoming unhealthy. When Laura, an independent consultant from the 1:1 diet got in touch asking if I’d like to try a 2-week programme with her I figured that I had nothing to loose so I jumped straight in. In fact, the plan looked so good that Hubby even joined in with me!

28.6.20

Am I a nice person?  |  Blog

Do you ever stop and wonder if you are a nice person? In fact, what even makes a nice person? How do you measure how nice you are? Is it measured by how nice you feel you are or how nice the world perceives you to be? Is it based on how kind you are to yourself and to others? Does it depend on how many friends you have and how liked you are? What makes a person nice? 

I’ve recently been feeling a whole host of emotions that I’m trying to work through and what a rollercoaster it has been. One of the biggest things I’ve been battling with is how likes I am and my need to feel validated. I think every one wants to be liked and I don’t believe that anyone actually enjoys beig disliked but what I can’t work out for the life of me is why I have such a deep set need to feel validated by others. 

When I was in my early teens I wanted to be liked by everyone. I wanted to be friends with everyone, I hated ever falling out with people and I would happily apology even if I wasn’t in the wrong just so that I could be liked and not have to deal with confrontation. This was a theme that I actually carried with me into early adulthood and even in my mid twenties I still had this ridiculous need to be liked by everyone. I would be careful about what I said as I would have hated to have ever upset or offended someone. I felt like I would change myself and the way I acted to please people and to fit into which ever group or circle I was with. Back then, it didn’t matter what I thought or felt because as long as I was liked and I was popular then everything would be okay. 

But then I became a Mother. I no longer wanted validation or to be liked as nothing else matter anymore. I learnt my self worth and how I felt was so much more important that what others felt of me. I had to be the best person I could possibly be for this little baby that depended on me. I needed to fight for what I believe in to make the world better for my babies. I needed to learn and understand what my core values and beliefs were so I could teach my children rather than be influenced by the thoughts of those around me just so that I could fit in. So that’s what I did. I took those people who didn’t bring me joy out of my life. If it caused me stress or pain then why did I need it? Those who I truly needed and wanted in my life accepted me for who I am. They didn’t try to change me or play mind games with me. There was never any jealously between us, only support, love and understanding. My circle became small but it became strong and that was all I needed. I had the family around me that loved me, believed in me and supported me along with friends who’s friendship is unconditional. I learnt that what you give in life is what you receive and sometimes you have to be picky as to who you give yourself too.

This wasn’t and still isn’t an easy thing to do though. Every now and again the old feelings start to creep back and the need for validation starts to grow again. It’s funny what triggers it. Most recently it has been triggered by being left out of something. An event that on paper you would have thought I would have been invited to, had a guest list without my name. My knee jerk reaction when I saw was the doubt myself. What had I done? Had I upset someone? Why wasn’t I liked? Should I apologise even though I don’t know what’s happened? Why wasn’t I invited? Am I a bad person? Am I not nice? Why don’t people want me? The hurt was there and the self doubt was real. 

Then I stopped. I stopped all the noise and the questions and I gained some clarity. Firstly, would I want to go? Deep down in my heart of hearts was this something that I passionately wanted to do? Secondly, if I was invited and I did go what would it bring to my life? What would I gain and would it be worth it? And finally what was the real issue here? Why was I upset about not being invited? Was it because I wanted to go or was it because I wanted to be liked and included? 

The truth was that I don’t think I did want to go. Going to this event wouldn’t have brought anything valuable to my life and in fact it could have potentially caused more negative thoughts and worry. When I was really honest with myself about why I was upset it wasn’t because I wasn’t invited. It was because I thought I wasn’t liked. The lack of invitation made me feel like I was being left out and therefore it wasn’t validating me in that friendship circle. The more I thought about this, the more I asked myself why I needed this validation so much. Why was I letting someone else’s thoughts and feelings about me get in the way of my happiness and positivity? The only validation I need is from myself and from those in my circle and I know I’ll always have that as those in my circle respect me enough to talk to me if ever there is an issue. No big deals are ever made and no dramas happen. It is mutual respect and love between a group of people who bring an invaluable amount of love and light into my life. 

So what’s the point in all this? Well, it’s a reminder to me and to anyone else out there that you don’t need the validation of people who don’t bring joy into your life. The sooner you (and I) realise this the happier we can become and we will stop trying to please others and instead focus on pleasing ourselves and those we truly care about. No matter how lonely or disliked you may feel remember that there are always people out there who love you, respect you and like you for who you actually are, not who they want you to be ❤️

8.6.20

2 years of you | Blog

2 years ago today was the day that our family became complete.
2 years ago today was the day that my baby became a brother. 
2 years ago today was the day that the hole in my heart that I never knew was there was filled. 
2 years ago today was the day that you came into our lives, Smidge. 

1 year ago today I sobbed into my prosecco at the thought of my baby turning 1. 
1 year ago today we had a huge BBQ with all of our friends and family to celebrate your first year. 
1 year ago today we celebrated the toddler you were becoming and I cried for the baby you were leaving behind. 
1 year ago today I had no of the adventure the next 12 months would bring.



Today you turn 2 years old. 2 years of loving you, cuddling you and kissing you. 2 whole years! It feels like so much longer as I can't imagine life without you. I can't remember what I was like without you, what Pickle was like without his brother and what Hubs was like without his other team mate. The last 12 months have been crazy. I thought I knew you completely a year ago but in the last 12 months you'v grown into such a character and a little personality. You've gone from being our terrorising, non sleeping, cuddle loving, food demolishing 1 year old into a funny, crazy, non sleeping and still cuddle loving, Peppa Pig obsessed 2 year old.



12.5.20

Going Eco during Lockdown | Blog & Review

Note - some of the items mention in this post were sent to us for review but all opinions are honest and my own. 

If you've read my blog for a while then you will know that at the start of last year I made a commitment to try and be more eco. I made small changes like using reusable face wipes with cleansing water instead of one use make up wipes. We use an eco egg in our washing rather than bottles of softener and washing tablets. I changed from tampons and pads to a menstrual cup and reusable sanity items. We have tried to make small changes to help our environment and waste less. When lockdown hit and people started to go nuts bulk buying everything and leaving nothing in the shops, I started to think even more about things that I could reuse and didn't need to buy each week or month. 7 weeks later and even though the stock levels in the shops seem to have returned to normal, we are sticking with changes that we've made during this time as we have less waste and plastic but also spend less at the shops too so I thought I'd share what we've done to be more eco during lock down. 

1. Turning to bars (and no, I don't mean the pub!)
Prior to lockdown we had made the switch from bottles of body wash to bars of soap. We brought a little crochet soap bag from our local refill room which is great as it helps it lather up more and found we didn't miss bottled shower gels or soap at all. Using bars of soap got me thinking about what else we could substitute in our bathroom and one thing that I found was shampoo and conditioner bars. Biovene Barcelona very kindly sent us a couple of samples of their solid shampoo and conditioner bars and Hubby and I were amazing. They do 5 different formulations which are dermatologist tested, plastic free, PH balanced and contain no sulphates, parabens or palm oil. Biovene Barcelona is a brand that does more about care about your hair. They are trying to do their bit as a cooperate brand to support the environment. They support global environmental projects such as Plant For Planet's Foundation and also cleanbeachinitaive.org, both who actively support a cleaner, greener planet. So these little bars aren't only great for your hair, they are great for the environment and our world too! We found that when the bar is used every day (hubby washes his hair daily) that they lasted about 3 weeks which, when you consider that that is about the same time as it would take Hubby to go through a bottle of shampoo, is going to be a huge saving of plastic waste from us. Biovene Barcelona bars are available from lovelulula.com, Amazon and biovene.co.uk


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