I miss my baby...

My baby is not much of a baby anymore...he still has baby moments where he wants to cuddle but he is become more and more of what I would consider a toddler. Thinking back 6 months ago, he was my baby. He depended on me to feed him his bottles, entertain him, cuddle him, move him from one place to another, basically he depending on me for everything. Now things are so different. He moves around on his own, feeds himself and holds his bottles on his own, happily plays with his toys and is such a little fidget bum that it's hard to steal a cuddle. Don't get me wrong, I know this is all part of his development and I am so proud that my baby is growing up into such a funny, cheeky, caring little boy but recently I have realised how much I miss that little baby.
People have said that its me being broody... "ooo you want another baby" and "I bet you'll be pregnant next year" are phases I hear regularly but it's not me being broody at all. I don't want another baby at the moment as I want to enjoy Bubba and the time we have just the three of us but I do just really miss him being a little baby. I partly feel like I didn't appreciate him being a baby enough and I was too excited about him growing up to really enjoy the baby stage. I think that sometimes when you are in that baby stage it's so exhausting and sometimes overwhelming that you look to the future for hope and that tends to stop you from really loving every single second which is something I regret. I think this is also all coming at me now as we approach such a huge milestone (bubba turns 1 in a couple of weeks) and it is seriously scary how fast this past year as gone!
In saying all this, there is nothing I can do about it and I'm not looking for advice, just to talk and express how much I miss my little baby.
So for now, I will push that little sad feeling down and just soak up every second with my almost toddler who is into everything and developing his own amazing albeit stubborn little personality. In those moments where I want to snuggle with that little baby again I will have to just reminisce on his baby photos....or failing that, pinch my best friends soon to be here baby for a squeeze :)


Don't judge me..

Why do people think that it's okay to comment on your parenting techniques and choices? Not people like your mum or friends but random people.. It drives me bonkers!

The other day I was speaking with a lady about my son (my favourite subject) and she asked me if I'd had my lunch yet. I said no and then this is how the conversation went..
Lady: oh well you should eat soon as you have to keep your strength up as a mummy.
Me: I'll be fine. He's such a good boy generally so doesn't cause me many problems.
Lady: yes but when your breast feeding you have to make sure you eat regularly to keep your supply up.
Me:oh no, I don't breast feed. Never have. My son is nearly one now so will be going onto cows milk soon too.
Well at that point the lady then slapped me (playfully) on the wrist and said
Lady: You naughty girl! I used to be a midwife you know and you should have breastfed.

I was in shock! I was shocked that a person that didn't know me from Adam had the audacity to scold me for not breastfeeding my son. I was so shocked that I couldn't even argue back. I just very politely finished the conversation and wished her a nice day and off she went without a second thought about how that comment had made me feel.

Who was she to judge my parenting preferences? She didn't know about how Bubba had been poorly when he was born and how I spent the first couple of days of his life in tears and feeling helpless than my poor baby had to go through so much. She wasn't there when I was desperately tying to get him to latch on when he was born but just couldn't do it. She didn't know how I had felt when we made the decision to bottle feed and how torn I had felt between carrying on trying and just giving my son the milk he was so vocally demanding.

I will always stand by my decision to bottle feed and have never once regretted what we did as it the long run it was without a doubt the best decision for all three of us and it didn't do him any damage at all. What I do hate though it the judgment of strangers and plead to everyone out there to never judge another parent on the way they raise their children until you know them and their situation. Every child and parent is different and being judged by a totally stranger is not helpful at all!!! I'm just glad I didn't start talking about he fact that we weaned bubbas at 4 months, then the poop would have really hit the fan!! :)

Have you ever been judged by a stranger? Or have you ever been the one doing the judging?
Would love to know your thoughts :)


What I wish I knew..

Yesterday a memory popped up on my time hope that really made me smile.. A year ago to the day I had written this-

....34 weeks today... That means 6 weeks till D day and a maximum of 8 weeks until we get to hold our little boy! Oh my goodness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was actually only 4 weeks until we would meet the little boy that would turn out lives upside down and inside our. I then thought back to this early newborn days and realised how much life has changed since then and it got me thinking about what I wish I had known back then that I know now.

1. After giving birth I was shocked as I felt like I had literally been hit by a train. I don't know what I expected to feel like by my entire body aches for a good couple of days. I wish I would have known that was going to happen to so I would have been a little less shocked.

2. When you have your newborn in your arms you will feel like the biggest bundle of nerves in the world. Every time they cry you will be nervous if you can't passifiy them instantly, you will panic that they are too hot, too cold, hungry etc. This never totally goes away as bubbas now 11 months old and I still worry about him but as they become older and the two of you spend more time together, it becomes easier for you to read what they want so it's not always has hard as it is in the early days. 

3. You will sleep again! I still remember all of the people that told me "rest now as you won't sleep properly again for 18 years" and granted, there are some nights that are bad but then again, more often than not, we get a good 7 hours sleep most nights. So I wish I would have know in those early days when we were up every 2 hours that we will sleep again but just not for a couple of months :) 

4. Your baby will stop crying at some point. This may sound like a strange one but bubba had silent reflux with a touch of colic and there were times where it felt like he would never stop crying. It made me so upset to hear him so upset and I sometimes couldn't see a light at the end of the tunnel. But their is a light.. Most things like reflux and colic they will grow out of so just ride it out. As hard as it is and as draining as it is, it doesn't last forever and it will get better! 

5. Don't stress! This was a huge one for me as in the early days and even months of bubbas life I felt like I stressed so much. I stressed that he wasn't feeding enough, that he wasn't growing right, that I wasn't stimulating him with enough educational toys and that he wasn't developing at the right speed (all because he didn't smile until 8 weeks!) and I honestly wasted so much time stressing. I just wish I listened when people said he was fine. I only stopped stressing when I learnt to trust my own judgement and I understood that I knew my baby better than anyone so I should trust my instincts.

I say that I wish I knew these things but if I did then I probably wouldn't have had the experience in the last year that I have had and as hard as it's been, I would not change one second of it as it has been the best year of my life!!

Have you got any top tips for those new mummies or mummies to be out there? What did you wish you knew when you had your little one?


Muddle Puddles Review

When it starts raining, whats the first thing you do? You take cover inside or run out to get your washing off the line. Well not me and Bubs. When it rained the other day I jumped at the chance to get out in there and test out Bubbas new Puddles Pac-an-All-in-One (RRP £17.50) which we were very kindly sent from Muddle Puddles.

Muddle Puddles is a innovative brand whose aim is to clothe the worlds young explorers in the best outdoor clothes possible. They have created a range of products that are not only super cute looking and great value for money but are also practical, durable and 100% water and wind proof!

Picture taken from Muddy Puddles website
When we received this all in one suit, the first thing I loved about it was that it all fits into a little pouch that is built into the mac which, in turn, has a very handy little hook on it. This means that it is perfect for hooking onto bubbas trike or bag taking up minimal space. The second thing I loved was the pattern on the material. It is dark blue with really cute little rain clouds on it and I really couldn't wait to get it on Bubs and try it out. Knowing the way that the good old English weather is I didn't think that I would have to wait long for some rain for us to go and play in. I was really wrong! It didn't rain for almost a week and I was itching to get Bubs in his super little mac. When it did finally rain I was like a whirlwind getting Bubbas shoes one, getting his juice cup, a snack and my camera all ready whilst plopping him into his trike. As I was in a rush this was a great time to see how easy it was to get Bubba into and I was not disappointed. The wrists and ankles are really elasticated which meant it was really easy to get a wiggling toddler into and the zip up front meant that in one swift movement, Bubba was all set and ready to go.

We then set off to our local woods for a little walk in the rain. I must have looked like a crazy person but to be honest, I don't think anyone noticed me as everyone we passed commented on how cute Bubba looked in his little Mac (I am being totally honest here!). One lady even stopped me and asked where it was from as she wanted one for her little one as she loved the design and thought it was such a great idea. Whilst I was chatting to the lady I looked down to Bubba suddenly remembering that we were standing in the pouring rain and worrying that he was going to be wet and he was totally dry, comfortable and very happy.

This product honestly exceeded my expectations! In my opinion it is such a high quality design which was easy to get Bubba in and out of and also really easy to clean (someone might have spat crackers all down the front of it!?!). For £17.50 I really don't think you can go wrong and this has now become a staple item in my changing bag as its so handy to have with me.
Overall...rating it on a 1 - 5 scale (5 being excellent 1 being poor) I would give the Muddle Puddles Pac-an-All-in-One the following:

 Fit - 5            

 Quality  - 5

 Durability  - 5

 Comfort -  5

 Price - 5

I honestly don't think that anything can be done to make this product any better and I would defiantly recommend it to any of you Mummies and Daddies out there that love getting your little ones outdoors! Browse Muddle Puddles full range by visiting their website here: www.muddypuddles.com

Note: this product was sent to us for review purposes but all opinions are honest and my own. 


The dark side of blogging.

When I started blogging back in April, I started because I wanted to write all about my little boy, share all of my experiences and memories and I wanted to blog for me. As time went on I became aware of how important things like numbers, followers, scores and DA were but I didn't really let it phase me as I was just blogging for me.
Now, almost 5 months down the line this blog has been more successful than I ever imagined but that success has come with some major downsides as I have now become one of those people that I didn't want to be.. I am bothered about numbers, I find myself thinking about DA and how to improve it and start questioning the quality of my blog and writing when I don't have any emails from anyone for a few days. It's stupid and I didn't like what this blog and I were becoming. I decided I will not become one of those bloggers who just post about and review everything and anything just so that they can keep 'in' with PR companies and brands that aren't even remotely linked to their blog genre. I also don't want to become the type of blogger who lacks the personal side and doesn't respond to tweets or Facebook comments as the community is part of the reason I love blogging. I have been on the flip side of this and tweeted or left comments for someone and when they don't get back to you it does make you feel a little crap and stupid for every tweeting/commenting.
The other thing that I have seen recently is how fickle and transparent the blogging world really is. Don't get me wrong, I have found some amazing people through the blogging community that make me roar with laughter and are a fantastic bunch of crazies but there have been some that could not be more different. Maybe it's just me but I have noticed more and more recently the number of 'large' bloggers (not in size (lol) but in following) that I have seen become less personal and caring and more about promoting and making money. If that's what they want to do and they want their blog to become a business then good on them and I wish them ever success but what I don't like is when they come across all ''Oh I am a real person, I'm down to earth, just someone who blogs about life/beauty/parenting etc because I want to share'' when really then couldn't give a crap about their readers and followers. All they care about are numbers, brands, PR's and where their next review product is coming from.
This may sound harsh and I think this may touch a nerve with some. I just wish people would stop being fake and just be who they are on their blogs. I know that this is the nature of the internet and that people can be whoever they want to be blah blah blah but I do not want to become a number watcher. I want to get back to basics with my blog and write about things I love. I am not saying I won't do reviews/sponsored posts BUT I will only do them with products and services that I truly believe in as I would never want to lead on anyone that reads my blog. I also think that if I would to write a review about, for example, self storage when I normally write about parenting and family, that anyone that reads it would be a bit like...ermm wtf?? :)
 I am also making a commitment right here and now to NEVER stop responding to the lovely people who read my blog. I have recently been really bad at this but no more! I write for me but I love nothing more when someone says that can relate to the post or that it has helped them and if they take the time to tell me it's only right that I take the time to thank them.
So thats it...no more will I be falling into the dark side of blogging and I won't be bogged down with scores and numbers. I will blog for me and if people, other bloggers, PR's, brands and anyone else doesn't like it then let me know...I can point you in the direction of some blogs that I am sure you will love ;)


It's been a while...

I can't believe that the last time I blogged was almost 2 weeks ago and life hasn't even really been that busy...it's just been everyday stuff getting in the way of the blog or making me so super busy in the day that I just collapse on the sofa at the end of the day. So seeing as its been a while I thought I would give you a little up date :)

Top: When we moved in
Middle: 2 weekends ago
Bottom: This monday
The biggest thing that we have going on at the moment is the renovation of our garden. We brought our house 2 years ago this month and we knew that we were going to need to do the garden at one point. When we brought the house the garden was all patio with lot's of pot plants and bushes. Over the past 2 years we have just done the bare minimum to keep it looking okay and so that we were able to use it for the occasional BBQ. When Bubba was born we knew that we would need to get the garden sorted sooner rather than later as a totally concrete garden is obviously not ideal for a child. So we are now in the process of removing all the patio, getting a new shed, making a wood chipped play area for Bubs, turfing the garden and sorting some smaller flower beds. Hubby is working so hard (along with lot's of help from friends and family) and it is really starting to come together. I just can't wait until it's all finished...and it HAS to be finished by the 12th September which leads me on to the next thing..

My baby turns 1 in almost a months time. What? When did this happen?? Where have I been this last year as it sure doesn't feel like a year has passed!! To celebrate bubbas 1st birthday I really wanted to have a nice, chilled BBQ with our close family and friends and that is why we have such a rush to get the garden done. I'm going to be doing a few blog posts in the coming month talking about Bubba turning 1 in more detail but for now..him turning 1 soon has just been totally overwhelming me! I don't think it helps that I recently had my first contraceptive injection and it is totally causing havoc with my hormones! I can feel it and have said to hubby on a couple of occasions that I think I'm having a mood swing as beware but I am just really hoping it settles down soon as then I might be able to get back into the swing of things a little bit more.

Apart from all that, life has been pretty good. Bubba is coming on leaps and bounds (watch out for a post coming soon call 'When did my baby become a toddler') and we are just trundling along :)

Look forward to writing a bit more in the coming weeks as I have really missed it and feel that My Mummy spam has been a little bit neglected.



Family time is the best time

Today I am back at work after a week of bliss. Last week was the first time since Bubba was born that we have spent an entire week together as a family and I loved every single second of it. We didn't do anything fancy but everything we did, we did together as a family and it was wonderful.

We went to a Zoo one day and seeing Bubba looking at all the animals was amazing but what was even more amazing to me was seeing how much of a wonderful Daddy my Husband is. He has spent every second possible with our little boy this week and bubba has loved it so much. They have been being silly, played lot's, had lot's of cuddles and kisses and a had lot's of baby chat discussions as Bubba has all of a sudden become really chatty. Watching the two of them has melted my heart and I could sit and watch them for hours.
We took Bubs out on his trike for walks in the woods and to the park, went swimming, hubby and I laughed until we cried over the silliest things and we spent time in doors building towers and helping bubba learn to walk. It has made me feel so refreshed and feel so much more connected to hubby as I spend so much time with bubs and not a lot of time with hubs so it was lovely to remember what I love about him and actually spend some quality time with him.

We didn't have to spend lot's of money, didn't have to go and do anything major but we just had to spend time together. Family time is well and truly the best time and I can't wait until we get to do it all again in September :)